Patiently Waiting

The first Sunday in Advent I was sitting in the church prior to mass staring at the Advent wreath. I was desperately trying to get into the spirit of Advent when it dawned on me that I was already there. After all, Advent is the season of waiting is it not?

God told me something that brought me to tears that morning and has given me an eerie sense of peace about things since then. What He so clearly reminded me of was that time is inconsequential in His eyes. What's two...or three...or six more months of waiting for the house to be finished in the grand scheme of things? Who's to say I'll even be here next week? After waiting for so long what's a few more weeks or months? A few years from now, it will all be a distant memory.

This perspective has helped me over the last two weeks as I try to juggle Christmas preparations, new house preparations, current house packing, raising three kids, growing one and having a new goddaughter thrown into the mix. I was completely overwhelmed at first but then I had to let go. I can only do so much these days and if I don't know when to stop, my body very clearly does the deciding for me. I do get frustrated, but I've given up on being worried.

Then came the third Sunday in Advent. As I went over the readings before mass, I noticed a clear theme - waiting. Okay God, I get it. But this Sunday something different caught my eye. I'm not supposed to be just waiting, but PATIENTLY waiting. Unfortunately for me, this is something God has tested me in time and time again only to see me fail. Consequently, He keeps giving me more opportunities to practice.

So Sunday the pink candle was lit. It was Gaudete Sunday, a time of joyful hope for the arrival of the Christ child. This hit home for me before Father even spoke. Isn’t it just like God to know that in the midst of a season of waiting, we need a little reminder of exactly who we’re waiting for? It was perfect for me as the baby practiced his or her kickboxing skills on my bladder.

I’m happy to say that I’m not just waiting anymore (although I am counting the days remaining until my due date), I’m patiently and joyfully waiting. I think of poor old Simeon sitting on the steps of the temple holding the Christ Child in his arms. He waited his whole life for that moment. Surely…surely, I can wait twelve more weeks for this baby and I can wait however long I have to for the house to be finished. I can wait because I know there’s an end. I know I don’t have to wait forever. I also know that whatever time I wait now, no matter how long it is, is really very, very inconsequential in God’s time.

O come, O come Emmanuel (and baby…and house). REJOICE, REJOICE, Emmanuel shall come to you O Israel .