Listening to Jesus

The Holy Thursday service at our church is very beautiful but also very long. Aiden did exceptionally well. He quietly colored during some parts and curiously watched other parts of the mass.

By the end though, he was getting antsy and a bit louder with his questions. I tried desperately to get him to quiet down for the procession of the Eucharist around the church. I knew what followed was silent Adoration and I didn’t want Aiden disturbing the prayer time.

He watched intently as the priest processed right next to him with the Eucharist. He was in awe and pretty quiet. By the time the procession reached the side altar, however, the barrage of questions began. “Where is Father going? Why is it there and not over there? Why he wearing that thing? What we going to do now?”

“Aiden,” I tried desperately to explain as quietly as I could, “this is a special time for you and Jesus. You are supposed to be really quiet and listen to him.”

“Oh,” he replied and then leaned towards the altar. “I hear him Mama!” His face lit up and he was obviously excited to have success so quickly.

“What is he saying?”

He leaned a little closer, paused and then said, “Oh, that’s not him.”

“Well be quiet and give him a chance to talk. You won’t be able to hear anything if you’re talking the whole time,” I told him.

Still leaning in and trying really hard to listen, he looked at me again and said in a rather frustrated voice, “I don’t hear anything! He’s not talking to me.”

I tried to reassure him, “Listen very carefully.”

This time he leaned in further and put his hand to his ear. He paused a few seconds and became a bit disheartened. “I still don’t hear anything Mama.”

“Aiden, remember that Jesus is in your heart. You probably won’t hear him with your ears. You have to listen to with your heart.”

He looked a bit perplexed and thought for a second. Again his hand went to his ear. He looked at me and then quickly down at his chest. He leaned his head as far into his shoulder as he could, grabbed his shirt and pulled it to his ear. “Mama, I just can’t listen to my heart. It’s too hard.”