A Bad Day
Today did not start well. After that it got worse. And, so far I'm not heading for a great ending either.
I think the stress of the last couple of weeks finally got to me. Until this morning I had been holding it together like a champ. Working on little to no sleep, my grandfather's death, the trip from you know where, my little girl going back to school, my brother heading back to Italy, taking care of a new baby (the kitten, who by the way has been named Prince Charming), I managed to put on a brave face and push through.
Aiden was HORRENDOUS at mass this morning, so much so that I am seriously contemplating taking that off my list of things to do. By the end of mass he was yelling, "PLEASE don't spank me when we get to the car!" over and over and over. People say that one day I'll laugh at all this. Today I did see anything humorous about it at all.
At the grocery store a complete stranger yelled at me, loud enough that everyone's head turned. I had gotten distracted during the check out talking to a friend and did not realize the cashier was finished. The stranger felt the need to let me, as well as everyone around me, know my mistake.
It broke me. I don't know what happened. Tears are still welling up as I type. Thank God my friend was there or else I would have lost it in the store. I was too embarrassed to do that in front of someone I knew. As soon as I got in the car though, it was over. I even prayed for the stranger. Honestly, it didn't make me feel any better.
Sometimes life is just hard. I know that. Some days you just need a pat on the back. A reassuring word. Something nice to happen. Instead I got yelled at.
Thankfully, my mom called me on my way home and listened to me. However, I am tired and I just can't seem to shake those hurtful words.
Because of this I plan to make tomorrow a be kind to strangers day. You just never know what someone is going through. You never know how much a smile or kind word might mean to someone who hasn't heard one in a long time. In fact, I'm going to make it my mission from here on out. I'm sure I won't do it perfectly but a little effort will hopefully prevent me from ever making someone feel the way I do today.
posted by Amy Parris @ 10:50 PM
4 Comments:
Amy, I can totally relate to what you are going through.
I remember when my grandmother passed away almost 4 years ago. I was keeping it together, handling what had to be handled. And then WHAM, out of the blue, something little made me fall apart.
We have to let go of the idea that "Mom doesn't get to fall apart" and just let it happen before it nails us in the grocery store. It is OK, it is natural, to lose it at some point, when you are grieving. Because you are grieving, and you will be for a while.
I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your grandpa, and all that you've been going through recently.
Consider yourself "hugged" from this mom who is saying an extra prayer for you this morning.
{{{{{hugs}}}}}
It's going to be ok.
And it's ok to slow down, too.
Thanks so much ladies. Things are looking up today. I'm sure it's all of your prayers.
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